family secret

The design above is from Anya's pajamas. She decided that it is our family. Mommy, Daddy, Anya and Evan. And the little heart inside mommy is the baby. Yes, you got it...we're having a baby! We've been so delinquent about posting our news, so I'm already 17 weeks along! In order to spare you from having to ask the most popular questions, I'll share the answers with you in advance. If I missed one, just ask!

When are you due?
September 15thish

What took you so long to tell everyone?
For me especially it took a really long time for it to sink in and I just wanted/needed to keep it to myself for a while. I don't know why it felt so differently this time. I guess I was mostly worried about judgment from other people. I know...it's not their decision and none of their business...blah, blah, blah, but for some reason having three kids just seemed to put me in a different category. Perhaps it was just me putting myself there, but nonetheless that's how it felt. I'm mostly over it now except for the occasional insensitivity of someone else's comment.

What does Evan think?
Are you kidding? He's clueless. He's fine. We're fine with that. Remember when I was pregnant with Evan that we hardly told Anya about it until the very end and even then didn't really "prepare" her until he was born. Luckily, our plan (or lack thereof) didn't backfire and she went along perfectly with everything. Who knows...Evan might not be so easy going, but he's got no idea what's coming, nor should he, and they'll be time for the other stuff later on.

What does Anya think?
We told her before we started telling people locally right before 12 weeks or so. Ideally, we would have waited longer to tell her, but we really wanted her to hear it straight from us and not just overhear something someone else said about the baby. Her initial reaction was almost no reaction. It wasn't bad at all, but she almost acted as if she didn't even hear us. In thinking about it later, it occurred to me that perhaps she didn't really get than anything had changed. I mean, we've always had a vague answer about maybe we'd have another baby someday. And it's not like we were bringing home a baby the next day. So, to her it may have just seemed like no big deal. Since that initial very brief conversation, it has been brought up in equally brief moments, so I know she understands, but it doesn't really seem to be causing much reaction either way.

Was this a surprise?
No.

Are you crazy?
Yes.

Is this your last one?
Yes.

Are you going to find out the sex?
Yes.

Do you have a preference?
If you've been a blog reader for a while, you'll recall my emotions over finding out we were having a boy with Evan. And I knew that I wanted to separate the finding out from the actual birth. That way by the time he was born there was no disappointment and just wonder and amazement at our new baby. It will be the same time this way, no matter what we're having. Both Anya and I are hoping for a girl, so I think we need some adjustment time if we're having a boy. I think it will make it more real for Anya if she knows what we're having. By the way, her logic on wanting a girl is just as simple as that she already has a brother, so she needs a sister. So I think it will be good for her to get used to the idea either way. And we have no name ideas right now, so at least knowing the sex would make it easier to focus our search.

Are you going to get to the hospital sooner this time?
Let's hope so, I guess. Getting there with Evan and finding out that I was already nine centimeters dilated was amazing and made the hospital part go quickly, but it was a bit chaotic. Although I didn't have to answer all their annoying intake questions. We're using the same doula and she thinks that I'll listen to my body and believe what is going on more this time. We'll just have to see. We probably won't get as lucky as having Anya nap and stay in her room for my home labor part, so we'll definitely have to get our kids out of here sooner than last time.

Is your house big enough for three kids?
Of course it is. We are accustomed to rearranging things around here, so we'll just keep doing it. The vague plan is to have Anya and Evan share a room at some point either before or after the baby is born. Anya has a dream of her and Evan sharing bunk beds in her red room. So far we've been reluctant to combine them because Evan is still not sleeping through the night. (Yes, I know he'll be two this week.) But we may just do it anyhow. And the baby could always sleep in our room for a while if we change our mind. So, we'll figure something out like we always do.


Well, I think that's all the questions people have been asking us lately. We are really excited although also appropriately worried about the changes for everyone.

Phew! Now I can hopefully get back on the blogging. I have had all these posts going on in my head, but everything seems to have a component related to the baby, so I have just been blocked from writing anything. Now that I've finally got this news out there I can keep going on this and other stuff.